(Thursday, January 12, 2006)
the new place doesn't have broadband internet. nor does it have a telephone line.
so every minute i'm home it feels like i can hear the clock's second indicator ticking every so silently. tick...tock...tick...tock, you get the idea. after two days assult commenced by micro-volume tick-tocking at home (the effect is rather in the head), i hate to admit the internet withdrawal has only touched the surface.
somehow, it's safe to say being addicted to internet is better than being addicted to drugs but the outcomes have their similarities; lost of social life, depature from the real world, profound need for an alternate world, obesity and others. but it's not really. an addiction is an addiction. the big trouble is, i can't really recall what i used to do when i'm not online everynight, navigating through oceans of webpages and showering pornography with attention. in hollywood, the parallel would be movies where the hero has a problem remembering their past then starts shooting around CIA, FBI, SEAL, navy, mafia, neighbour daughter, kids, your mama to retrieve answers for his paranormal state of memory. normally, with enough magazines of bullets and a substantial amount of violence, things would turn out fine for him. but i can't kick shoot my way into the telco company as much as i love to.
so for the next few months, there's nothing more to do than to resort myself in doing real things i've abandoned since ice-age instead of craving for a virtual harmony. see some real people, take some real drinks, rake some real girls from a real bar and if possible, have some real obscene sex with real girls with real big tits. there must 2 billions girls out there who's desperate to have sex because the men pagan themselves to the internet and pornograhpy and other men. a total social massacre if i ask me.
after my segregation with the sine qua non of my life, the bloody internet, life has become less stagnant. interesting ingredients to a life less ordinary are given a rare chance to shine effortlessly in the absence of ineffable internet. hell, tonight i'm participating in a cult to dispose all those little fragile indelible fucking kids and tomorrow i'm leaving for my beach house. sometimes, things we love just poison us into an object for their expanse. it's not really an abstruse, we just firmly believe there's nothing better out there. there was is something better. for one, i don't want to be labelled as a computer geek, eh joyce?
11:53 AM
that fucking traitor
liEw, 18 and since 2002, 270lbs, 5ft, brazilian chinese russian icelander hybrid, black eyes, short black hair, racist, antisocial, semi-alcoholic, ignorant, exhales profanity, black-poetry fanatic
