stolen beauties
(Sunday, January 30, 2005)
about 4 years ago, i met someone in multimedia university, cyberjaya while i was studying there and when we were asked to draw something with charcoal in class, she sketched something that she claimed is the most beautiful thing ever. it's a pregnant women. days later, i found out that her mother passed away from cancer. accidentally stumbled upon this photo in anopenshutter.com and i wonder how is she doing now...
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...says nothing at all, but simply stares upward into the dark sky and watches, with sad eyes, the slow dance of the infinite stars.
Stardust, Neil Gaiman
those were the last words of a book i read recently. by far, it's one of the best book i've ever read. beautifully written. to all the people who has nothing to do, go and get it. if you don't like it, please don't bring a dozen rotten eggs and smash it on my car. I DON'T LIKE THAT! just, write me hate mails. i promise i'll reply.
some particular individual enjoying his own time and was shot because of it.
(Saturday, January 29, 2005)in new york, some blonde chick is having the best shag of her life now. all because she went to a new hairstylist on last thursday and got a new haircut. not to mention a hot date right too. 'if only she is a guy', she thought...
in africa, the kid's father is trying to explain to him the difference between a rhino and an elephant. he thinks that it's a same cause they all love water. that was before the dad slapped him for the 56th time.
in iraq, us generals are having another secret meeting in their dark-with-only-1-light-rambo-type-basement-level-room. magically, they know that nex big plan is to shove a 5 kilo durian (if they know what it is) up a terrorist's ass. some random guy suggested mango instead of durian.
in malaysia, the land where nothing ever happens and the grass is green and the sea is blue, sky is hazy and monkeys like to stare at cars at the side of the road, a young little boy is dreaming of hot latinas in swimsuit giving him a lap dance. then the little boy's phone rang.
lil boy's pink phone: you wanna makan?
lil boy: no. i'm sleeping.
lil boy's pink phone: oh. bye.
so the little boy continued dreaming about sweaty latina's although not quite the same anymore for 10 seconds before his muthafucking phone goes off again. sms. it goes a little something like this.
squash? sorry la bro, don't despise me. hate will do. you have better things to do than sleep mar.
and this
i got an idea, you know planes...boeing 747 and all? you car can be doink 7877. install a horn that goes moo moo. damn nice wei! followed by it seemed a pretty good idea i got inspiration when i was throwing something into the rubbish bin.so i figured it must MEAN something right?
so poor lil' boy tried to ignore all the nonsense and went back to sleep. in his dreams, the hot latinas changed into transvestite with beard. wow. so poor little boy woke up, shivering, so scared he almost pissed in his pink coloured boxers.
craving
(Thursday, January 27, 2005)after a week of bread and porridge, i'm starving. i craving for 10,000 variety of food on my dinner table now. preferably cakes. cheese cake to be specific. last cheese cake i had seems like eons ago.
i drove 30 minutes today to get some seafood noodle. (not exactly, i was in that area for work purposes anyway. but i made the effort to get my phat ass there.)
anyone wants to take for an eating trip? i'm still hungry.
as good as it gets
()perhaps it's me. well, maybe it's not really me but i went 3 different doctors for 4 times because i had a fever. the first doctor gave me medicine that i'm allergic with so i went to 2nd doctor and he gave me pills that makes me sleepy and gives me rashes instead of getting rid of them.
times like this is difficult. instead of hunting for a doctor that cures your illness, we're actually looking for a doctor who doesn't poison us to death. the logic; if we don't die, we're alive and kicking. eventually, we will get better. what kind of society have lunatic doctors that try to heal you by killing you before cancer or virus gets to you first? not to mention doctors that reads mary shelley's frankenstein all day long in their office, secretly planning to build a secret lad in their clinic. fucking madness. doctors should read soft porn magazine instead of medical monthly. you know, to loosen up a little. they look so tense all the time. fuck professional etiquette, trying to murder me before i become the next prime minister isn't professional.
personally, i'm not very fond of doctors. not because they get to have sex with some hot mama in uniforms, they gave me major trauma when i was younger. for example, this doctor gave me a shot on my ass because i had a minor food poisoning. then this other doctor called me girl just because i'm with longer hair (ok ok, so what if i'm bald now?) and fairer than average fugly malaysian chinese. most of the time, i'd rather not go to the doctor and stay sick but this time around i need to work so i needed healing asap. then the crazy frankenstein-crazed doctor gave me more than i can handle.
the government should politely ask the existing doctors not to try anything funny. seriously.
next door nigga. may he rest in peace
()2Pac became the unlikely martyr of gangsta rap, and a tragic symbol of the toll its lifestyle exacted on urban black America. At the outset of his career, it didn't appear that he would emerge as one of the definitive rappers of the '90s — he started out as a second-string rapper and dancer for Digital Underground, joining only after they had already landed their biggest hit. But in 1992, he delivered an acclaimed debut album, 2Pacalypse Now, and quickly followed with a star-making performance in the urban drama Juice. Over the course of one year, his profile rose substantially, based as much on his run-ins with the law as his music. By 1994, 2Pac rivaled Snoop Dogg as the most controversial figure in rap, spending as much time in prison as he did in the recording studio. His burgeoning outlaw mythology helped his 1995 album Me Against the World enter the charts at number one, and it also opened him up to charges of exploitation. Yet, as the single "Dear Mama" illustrated, he was capable of sensitivity as well as violence. Signing with Death Row Records in late 1995, 2Pac released the double-album All Eyez on Me in the spring of 1996, and the record, as well as its hit single "California Love," confirmed his superstar status. Unfortunately, the gangsta lifestyle he captured in his music soon overtook his own life. While his celebrity was at its peak, he publicly fought with his rival, the Notorious B.I.G., and there were tensions brewing at Death Row. Even with such conflicts, however, 2Pac's drive-by shooting in September 1996 came as an unexpected shock. On September 13, six days after the shooting, 2Pac passed away, leaving behind a legacy that was based as much on his lifestyle as it was his music.
The son of two Black Panther members, Tupac Amaru Shakur was born in New York City. His parents had separated before he was born, and his mother moved him and his sister around the country for much of their childhood. Frequently, the family was at the poverty level, but Shakur managed to gain acceptance to the prestigious Baltimore School of the Arts as a teenager. While he was at the school, his creative side flourished, as he began writing raps and acting. Before he could graduate, his family moved to Marin City, CA, when he was 17 years old. Over the next few years, he lived on the streets and began hustling. Eventually, he met Shock-G, the leader of Digital Underground. The Oakland-based crew decided to hire him as a dancer and roadie, and as he toured with the group, he worked on his own material. 2Pac made his first recorded appearance on the group's spring 1991 record, This Is an EP Release, and he also appeared on their second album, Sons of the P. The following year, he released his own debut, 2Pacalypse Now. The album became a word-of-mouth hit, as "Brenda's Got a Baby" reached the R&B Top 30 and the record went gold. However, its blunt and explicit lyrics earned criticisms for moral watchdogs, and Vice President Dan Quayle attacked the album while he was campaigning for re-election that year.
Shakur's profile was raised considerably by his acclaimed role in the Ernest Dickerson film Juice, which led to a lead role in John Singleton's Poetic Justice the following year. By the time the film hit theaters, 2Pac had released his second album, Strictly 4 My N.I.G.G.A.Z., which became a platinum album, peaking at number four on the R&B charts and launching the Top Ten R&B hit singles "I Get Around" and "Keep Ya Head Up," which peaked at number 11 and 12, respectively, on the pop charts. Late in 1993, he acted in the basketball movie Above the Rim. Although Shakur was selling records and earning praise for his music and acting, he began having serious altercations with the law; prior to becoming a recording artist, he had no police record. He was arrested in 1992 after he was involved in a fight that culminated with a stray bullet killing a six-year-old bystander; the charges were later dismissed. 2Pac was filming Menace II Society in the summer of 1993 when he assaulted director Allen Hughes; he was sentenced to 15 days in jail in early 1994. The sentence arrived after two other high-profile incidents. In October of 1993, when he was charged with shooting two off-duty police officers in Atlanta. The charges were dismissed, but the following month, he and two members of his entourage were charged with sexually abusing a female fan. In 1994, he was found guilty of sexual assault. The day after the verdict was announced, he was shot by a pair of muggers while he was in the lobby of a New York City recordings studio. Shakur was sentenced to four-and-a-half years in prison on February 7, 1995.
Later that month, Shakur began serving his sentence. He was in jail when his third album, Me Against the World, was released in March. The record entered the charts at number one, making 2Pac the first artist to enjoy a number one record while serving a prison sentence. While he was in prison, he accused the Notorious B.I.G., Puffy Combs, Andre Harrell, and his own close friend Randy "Stretch" Walker of orchestrating his New York shooting. Shakur only served eight months of his sentence, as Suge Knight, the president of Death Row Records, arranged for parole and posted a 1.4 million dollar bond for the rapper. By the end of the year, 2Pac was out of prison and working on his debut for Death Row. On November 30, 1995 — the one-year anniversary of the New York shooting — Walker was killed in a gangland-styled murder in Queens.
2Pac's Death Row debut, All Eyez on Me, was the first double disc of original material in hip-hop history. It debuted at number one upon its February release, and would be certified quintuple platinum by the fall. Although he had a hit record and, with the Dr. Dre duet "California Love," a massive single on his hands, Shakur was beginning to tire of hip-hop and started to concentrate on acting. During the summer of 1996, he completed two films, the thriller Bullet and the dark comedy Gridlock'd, which also starred Tim Roth. He also made some recordings for Death Row, which was quickly disintegrating without Dre as the house producer, and as Knight became heavily involved in illegal activities.
At the time of his murder in September 1996, there were indications that Shakur was considering leaving Death Row, and maybe even rap, behind. None of those theories can ever be confirmed, just as the reasons behind his shooting remain mysterious. Shakur was shot on the Las Vegas strip as he was riding in the passenger seat of Knight's car. They had just seen the Mike Tyson-Bruce Seldon fight at the MGM Grand, and as they were leaving the hotel, 2Pac got into a fight with an unnamed young black man. It has been suggested that this was the cause of the drive-by shooting, and it has also been suggested that Knight's ties to the mob and to gangs were the reason; another theory is that the Notorious B.I.G. arranged the shooting as retaliation for 2Pac's comments that he slept with Biggie's wife, Faith Evans. Either way, Shakur was shot four times and was admitted to University of Nevada Medical Center. Six days later, he died from his wounds.
Hundreds of mourners appeared at the hospital upon news of his death, and the entire entertainment industry mourned his passing, especially since there were no leads in the case. Many believed his death would end the much-hyped East Coast/West Coast hip-hop rivalry and decrease black-on-black violence. Sadly, six months after his death, the Notorious B.I.G. was murdered under similar circumstances. As Shakur's notoriety only increased in the wake of his death, a series of posthumous releases followed, among them Don Killuminati: The 7 Day Theory (issued under the alias Makaveli in 1996), R U Still Down? (Remember Me) (1997), Still I Rise (1999), Until the End of Time (2001), and Better Dayz (2002).
it's gonna be a short break
(Monday, January 24, 2005)actually i'm feeling not so myself right now. ever since i had a fever last week till now, i bloody exhausted. can't help it since i'm allergic to the medicine the 1st doctor issued with me. so i'm taking a short break until i get better. well, at least until i'm more like myself or when i'm feeling much better.site will be flowing with updates if i get through this
plagued
(Wednesday, January 19, 2005)knock knock
who the fuck???
virus!
virus who?
fever virus...
what the fuck, get the fuck away yo', you lil' shit
i'm coming in whether you like it or not!
fuck my ass, if you can, get on in...
so fever virus broke the door and screwed my army of white bloody cells and came in anyway. not only did he fuck with my ass, he raped me like i'm his whore.
considering that i slept 20 hours yesterday, my eyes still hurts. actually the whole body aches like i've been thrown onto a washing machine. feels like the body is all tangled up.
however, falling sick somehow gives you an alternative outlook to things. for instance, i'd like to be a cat. you see, cats seldeom call sick, more like once in every 2-3 years. moreover, all they do is to look busy, sleep last but not least, keep yourself clean. when kitty's hungry, it goes a lil meowwwwz. then it gets fed. not getting fever viruses alone makes me wanna be a pussy so much...
then at the same time, i wanna be Her Majesty's No.1 spy, James Bond, minus the martini, shaken not stirred part. fuck it, i'm having JD. bloody englishmen. well, despite the lack of love for martini, i wanna be him because James Bond doesn't fall sick either. have you ever seen Mr. Bond said (in heavy english accent), 'fuck those bloody terrorist's ass hair. can't you fucking see i'm on my sick leave you fucking bureaucrats, now leave me alone while i drink my martini, shaken, not stirred'. well, actually not only does Bond doesn't get fucking sick, that pimp also happens to have the nicest ride in town (yeah what the fuck!!!) and the best looking babes (black, white, russian, chinese, japs, and many more. his penis is more UN than un itself) in town just because he speaks in an accent we find it hard to understand. which explains why so many people wants to kill him so much, including me.
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instead of sleeping, i went net surfing for a change today. i found something very interesting. The worst and best movie of 2004. in my case, the worse movie of 2004 is only between Alexander and Catwomen. 'ass'lexander is by far the worse movie ever made, an i'm sorry didn't listen to ju shin. i was smart enough not to watch catwomen. the bloody custume looks unattractive, somehow unaerodynamic and really fucking dumb, what more sexy? if i had the budget for a movie like that, i'd make it into a softcore porn (if it's hardcore, even better) and cast pamela anderson as catwomen. see, pamela anderson spells meow, not some black chick in weird custume. to make the movie sell better, i'd probably call it pussygirl: before the meow. some people's got the right material but absolutely marketing. dumbass.
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got some good news for all the trance/dance fans out there. there's a really really good web-portal that plays trance tracks 24 hours. the better news is, there's more than 1 channel so there's more than enough of genres which you can handle. if you have iTunes, you can even view the song name. so, click on the link <di.fm>. long live trance...
frozen
(Monday, January 17, 2005)i saw her on the normally empty wooden couch on the tropical beach. although being in under the sun for hours is dreadful, i sat there to just to catch the glimpse of her beautiful disturbingly pale face. when she realised that my eyes never left her skinny yet tall frame, she walks over. in attempt to camouflage my attention on her, i shifted my eyes back to my book, blushing from embarrassment. when she laid her umbra onto the book which i was trying to dive in, she tapped her icing cold hand onto my shoulder and asked for fire. mahai, i cannot find my fucking lighter, oh cibai!!! holy muthafucking sweet punani, look at her long straight fingers...
that was when i got up from my sleep. i was smiling when i got back to sleep, smiling when i woke up, still smiling and my jaw hurts like fuck. how often do you see that GIRL? i think i've been drinking too much. my head's infected with cell-murdering toxins that's giving me a eden-like mirage. this is fucking good drug. best frozen memory.
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on the other hand, someone gave me the idea that chatting with somebody underage online is as bad as having sex with someone underage (i.e. 10 years old). i mean if you measure from the law's point of view, it's actually illegal to talk to anyone under 16 years old via internet as fucking a 11 year old nympho. come on, gimme a break, why the fuck should talking to a person online be given a barricaded? furthermore, i heard the singapore government placed a few underage girls around the internet to warn other about the consequences of breaking this law. god dammit, instead of chasing after people who committed crimes, they're luring people into committing crimes. what fucking logic is that? some people are really stupid and bored.
i think it's amazing
(Sunday, January 16, 2005)despite sleeping late, i had to get my lazy ass up at a squash game. my face red and capillary of my eyes is highly visible, evidence from the alcohol i had last night. still, i felt great. actually i was looking forward for the game because of some, *ahem*, external reasons...*chicks*
game went well and i went to bed after i got home. since then, i'm feeling slightly intoxicated and jaded. more like i feel i'm floating on the clouds. oh, yeah, i forgot to mention grumpy and irritatingly nagy. fucking hell, it feels so much better when i don't get the sleep i need.
you have no fucking idea what it feels like to watch a movie in the cinema when you feel light headed and sleepy. it felt so damn great. seriously it does. almost equivalant to watching sitcoms when you're high. it's like everything that goes through the brain has a 2 seconds delay. as far as i'm concerned, after i know what happened, it's already the next scene...
pfah, i think i'm gonna nap. feeling like this is amazing.
married women is so appealing
()that's one of the topics i spoke with the couple i went out with tonight...it's good to go out with some lovey dovey couple if you're single. gives you a perspective of things.
it was pretty great. no photos though, due to privacy issues.
shove it up
(Tuesday, January 11, 2005)you read!!! you fucking read? what the fuck you little shit...
that's a perfectly normal reaction from my friends when i told them i've ran out of reading materials. not everyone does not, most of them. like 80%. thank fuck i haven't told them i blog constantly. when i do, i'd like to take a camera and snap a picture of their ugly faces. that would sell, no shit.
so i've ran out of reading materials due to various reason such as a large sum dominating sloth-like cells in my system. come on, nobody's perfect. hence i'm reading everything i can get my hands on, brochures, oily old newpaper nasi lemak wrapper, the horseshit statements behind my bank statements/cheques and etc. as to curb my necessity to read more, i've been borrowing/filching magazines from coffeeshops. i never knew that there's plenty free stuffs to read although it's not avant-garde, well, it's fucking free! you don't have the grandeur right of complaning when you're fucking stealing!!!
since most the local magazines are like puki anyways, i'd save enough money to get a real book instead of paying for not-worth-jack-shit magazine when you can read it for free. there's not even a shadow of nudity without cencorship partnered with arcticles that's SUPPOSED to be funny but isn't really funny along with fugly models that poses funny in the ads. sheeesh, some magazines should be banned for humanity's sake and the stack of unsold magazines leftovers shoved up the editor's hairy virgin ass. but i don't mind reading it if it's free, you know, to fully understand the complex relativity-like theory on how to tell the difference between good and bad..it's important to know.
bloody eyes.
()due to some unknown reason, my left eye's vision kind of lost it's focus, the ambience things started blurring and when i rub it, semi-dried blood was glued to my hand. i freaked out so i went to bed as soon after i finish Deception Point (hahha, Jenny - I'M DONE WITH THE BOOK, satay on you when i'm at Kajang). at midnight, my eyelids were sticking onto each other like a pair of siamese twins, bonded but not meant to be together. i wonder if this means that i don't have to travel to Penang tomorrow, i'm pretty fucking tired.
dark side of the moon
(Monday, January 10, 2005)music of the moment: Dave Mattews Band - Crash into Me
warning - Stole this way of writing from Su Ann. i'm such a copycat.
CT's dad passed away last from an accident last weekend. Nerd called and told me about it but i never bothered to call him or pay the last respect to his dad at all. my friends thinks i'm a reptile. i disagree.
looking at the cars from an car yard made me shiver. reminds me of the accidents i've had. driving recklessly hurts. i'll try to be more careful in the road whenever i drive next time. no more speeding or tailgaiting or pulling stupid stunts like trying to drift the car, midnight racing with random cars and etc.
the game CDs and movie DVDs i bought to keep me occupied are spoilt. when i took it back, they're not. the home dvd player must be fucked. that's horseshit.
it's only monday and i'm desperately craving for cheese cake and wine, not to mention nasi goreng pattaya (fried rice). craving is for weekends. weekdays are made for homecook food.
shopping complexes are not infested by bloody kids anymore since the school started. now i can have my shopping privacy once again.
i actually took the effort to go school children leave their school this afternoon because i think school uniform is the sexiest ever Malaysia made/designed outfit.
going to Penang again day after tomorrow. travelling is a bitch when nobody drives you around. if i earn enough, i'll get my personal chauffeur. it makes travelling so enjoyable.
friday @ Aero
(Saturday, January 08, 2005)
tough luck, darling...
(Thursday, January 06, 2005)song of the moment: Basement Jaxx - Good Luck
something amazing happened today and i feel so great, i'd love to tell somebody, not anybody. coincidently, myn wee came online so i conviniently told her everything in a not-so-refined way. instead of getting the i'm so fucking happy for you reply which i was more or less expecting, she called me bodoh (stupid in english), then hoboh (i don't know what that means) followed by words like pffft, no fair, fuck off, what the fuck!!!, fuck you, lucky bastard...i wonder if she'll say that to me if she wasn't the first one to know. what a fucking turn-off!!!
then i wonder, if there is a good news that you badly need to get off your chest, like you're getting married not because you knocked some chick up or you accidentally slept with cameron diaz (or look-alike, who knows...) and she offers you more sex and additional 30 precious ringgit to keep your sexy mouth shut, who is the first person that you would tell? an individual that you would rather share with than anyone else? at first, i thought it would definately be my closest friend to know BUT apparently i have more than 1 really close friends. then the rest of the closest friends will think that they're as not trustworthy as the first person i told. then they will try to make you love them more...very complicated shit, that politics in friends.
in the end, the better choice is to keep everyone in the dark. can you imagine how tragic it is? you can't expose how lucky your ass is and they won't be burned by a fever of enviness/jealousy. meaning you can't fucking show off, what the fuck? that's catastrophic, unbelievable and unacceptable...you need to show off!!!
so what i was thinking of doing was, i'm gonna keep this to myself till i have the right moment to splash on everyone at the same time. in that way, they can't bloody skin me alive because i told someone else first. in that matter, they're gonna probably maim me anyhow because i didn't tell them any earlier.
conclusion: i think more than i should at times
i bought a new light. looks pretty good in my room innit?
'wheee'ness
(Tuesday, January 04, 2005)great news folks, i solved the non-stop-bloody-phone-ringing-problem. i fucking switched off that noisy sonnawabitch. for 3/4 of day my yesterday and 1/2 day today. in case you can't get me, no, i have not been anywhere near the sea on 26th dec and i'm certainly not dead.
on the other hand, work has completely consumed most of my precious time. a very good and reasonable excuse to camouflage my recent bad posts. also i haven't been getting much rest cause i'm not tired. there was one morning i mistakenly got up at 4 a.m and i saw su-ann and isabel still online, happily or sleepily in that case doing their stuff. that was when i decided that i should never ever leave school. my biggest regret in life, i left my uni.
steph cured my mid-teen depression by asking me for a movie. i was so happy, i reached steph's place an hour earlier. yes, i know, i'm not a very timely person. i can't help it, i was looking for an escape desperately. she was kind enough to bring me to a place where they serve alcohol. which in short period, nonetheless got me complete high, then took me for watch phantom of the opera.
here's the best part of the night, the alcohol only really kicked in when i was in the cinema so it was pretty much all about keeping a straight face and no dictator-laugh at the funny sad scenes. i must have grinned like a pervert throughout the whole movie, my jaw still hurts this morning. when i was driving home, i sung at the top of my lungs the tunes of phantom as the post-alcohol effect makes me happier than ever. i said a lot of dumb stuffs which makes kung-fu hustle scripts sound lame
i was so happy. flowers are everywhere, there's squirrels running around, dancing cartoon monkeys, zebras boucing on tramboline,
p/s - oh, ahhhhh
ring ring
(Sunday, January 02, 2005)that's the very sound i don't want to fucking hear now.
i haven't been sleeping properly. for maybe a week now. i feel a plague shouting 'victory!' out loud as it disarms my body resistance system minutely. i'm falling sick. mentally, not physically. migrain dominates most of my brain activities and when my head slightly touches the ever-so-comfortable pillow, the fucking phone rings. it fucking rings and rings. ok, i exeggerated by an accountable percentage, but it rings every half an hour when i want to sleep. as the muscle slowly loosen and the mind slowly reduces it's activities, the goddamned phone rings like it's never rang before. gotdangmuthafugginhonecrappysonwabitc
